It's not too hard to fall into the Anger pit when you hurt all the time. Actually, it becomes easier as time goes on and Pain does NOT go away. With having had two recent falls, my fighting spirit seems to have almost taken a back seat to just being plain MAD. I am mad at myself for having fallen, mad at having MORE Pain than normal, and mad at the setback this has brought to me.
It's been a hard recovery from these falls, and my dear husband seems to watch every step I take these days. But as I learn over the years of dealing with Chronic Pain, if I just listen and pay attention, somebody else who is suffering helps to teach me a new lesson and give me HOPE as I cope with this setback. I have a dear friend whose husband suffers terribly from Chronic Pain, and we have a joint Prayer Chain in which we pray for each other, hoping our prayers will give us both courage and strength to face the days of non-stop Pain. I had a really tough weekend and spoke with my friend Sunday night to see how her husband was doing. That's when my Pity Party stopped! She told me how bad his day had been, that he had suddenly decided to just go take a quick drive, something to try getting his mind off the Pain. We laughed as she spoke of his return and stating loudly, "Time to take a pain pill." Somehow, we managed to get through the rest of the day.
It was a joyful eye-opener for me because for those of us who suffer daily with Chronic Pain, we find simple things–like taking a drive to get away from the battle–so we can get our feet back under us and FACE the fight that rages on each day. For me, my pity party is over, and it's back to my daily battle. Feeling sorry for myself is a waste of time. Because I choose to LIVE and keep looking for a moment of Joy! Yes–I DO live with Chronic Pain, but it will not beat me.
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