A Painful reminder of the past...

This past week has been filled with deep sorrow in this beautiful part of Texas that we call home. It began with the sudden passing of a man who had given so much of himself, working to keep the historical aspects of our town intact for many others to enjoy. We grieved, and then death struck again as the early morning news came that our county sheriff had passed away suddenly from a massive heart attack! With each phone call, everyone kept repeating, "We just can't believe it. Are you sure this happened?" His funeral service was overflowing with people, who wanted so badly to pay their respects, say a silent Thank You and to offer up a silent prayer for his wife. More news came of another respected man leaving us, and it seemed the grief would not stop.

I began reflecting on how often my mood sours due to the Pain rising up as anger rises inside me for all the things taken from me. I know this is a pity party, and I should not allow it. But it's not as easy as one thinks it can be. When I heard of all these fine men suddenly passing, it brought my anger into full focus and I tried hard to reason it all away, talking with my husband, telling him that I knew deep inside how blessed I am to be alive and still have my dear husband with me. Simply said, I was working on counting my blessings. Progress was made, and my mood eased. But the good Lord had more news for me that would truly bring all my anger to a sudden halt.

A dear friend of mine and her husband who live here in our community had called to invite us over for dinner tonight, and I had to tell her that my husband was limping around as his gout had flared up, so we could not join them for dinner. She was very understanding and then said, "Did you hear about the two young men who passed away?" My first thought was, "Not again, Lord, please not again." This was the moment for my heart to be fully open as I learned that one young man, very respected here, had been at a benefit to help raise funds for another man who had been seriously injured in a car wreck. He was playing outside with some kids, and a football became lodged in the tree. He probably thought nothing of climbing up the tree to retrieve the ball so the game would go on. But as he was climbing down, suddenly he fell to the ground. For a brief second, all appeared to be fine as he stood up. But then just as fast, his body gave way, and he fell to the ground again. This time he did not get up...his neck had been broken, and he was rushed to the hospital by Air Flight. He passed away at the tender age of 24. I couldn't process this, and I knew the reason why. It was striking a nerve in me that brought a very painful reminder of my own past. My friend added that another young man, a 27-year-old, had been in a head-on car wreck, and he, too, had been taken from us.

All of this news has been so hard to understand and to think of the deep grief these families will deal with is heart-breaking. All I can do is pray for each one of them. My husband had been listening to the phone call, and I explained it to him. He sat for a while, so silent and lost in his thoughts, then suddenly turning to me and saying, "Do you truly have a clue as to just how lucky you were that day when you fell from that tree?" It took less than a second for me to say one word Yes. My mind had already gone back in time, and I could see everything as it was that day...the tree, sun shining, gentle breeze blowing, and a woman standing 12 feet up from the ground, thinking I was so strong. Then without any warning, screaming to God for help as I fell and hit the dirt, not realizing how I had altered my life and opened the door for Chronic Pain to join me.

Today brought deep sorrow and humility my way as I thought about the young man being up in that tree and how tragedy struck in the blink of an eye. My husband could see me processing this and lovingly offered these words to me: "Martha, we are so blessed because you are still here, the same thing could have happened to you! Please count your blessings, and thank the Lord for all He has given to us. We must pray for these folks who are hurting so much!"  


I agreed and knew we both would spend extra time in prayer for all these families who have a long journey ahead of them. Please say a prayer for these many families who are suffering on this day. Keep on looking up and counting your blessings.

God bless you all.