Meeting God at a very "young" Age!

I grew up in the country, living on a 1000 acres of land that my parents had leased from a good man who lived nearby us.  We could spend the entire day going around to check on the vast array of farm animals that my Dad kept careful watch on.  In the mid 1950's farmers could actually make a living from having large numbers of livestock because money was made from the wool sheared each year from the sheep, mohair sheared from goats and then taking young cows to market, trading them and always buying more.  It still amazes me as to how my Dad managed all this as he also held a full-time job, working at a large lake area on floating barges that worked with the local University for Naval Experiments.

My Mom made sure to have us all in Sunday School and Church each Sunday and I  recall hearing Bible stories about God, how great His Love was for each of us, and learning the Ten Commandments at a very young age, thinking "These are very important and I do NOT want to make God angry at me-Ever!"  I was learning so much about God in my "head" but being so young, still did not know Him in my "heart" and would think  something was Wrong with me for not feeling the "Love" of God.  At the time I was Six years old and a guilt seemed to grow bigger each day inside me, thinking "I am a bad person, and God must really be Mad at Me because I don't know how to Love Him yet!"

I read the Bible, always asking my parents about numerous verses, and would listen intently as they gave me a lesson they thought a Child could understand.  I  recall being outside-surrounded by hundreds of sheep and goats, "talking to God"-hoping this would help me find that special Love-but it seemed to elude me and I would cry myself to sleep at night, hoping the next day would open my heart to God.

Little did I know, my lesson was just days from being revealed to me-I had a dear cousin who was one year older than me and we loved each other like sisters.  She would visit often as our days were filled with glorious play, having a special "tea party for two" in which we laughed and acted so "grown-up" yet surrounded by all our special Dolls who served as the Observers for our Tea Party.  We would plan on how to arrange to go back home with the other, finding an old worn suitcase, filled with our clothes and have it hidden, but within quick grasp as we started to "beg" our parents to allow us another day or two of being together.

Children don't really comprehend serious illness-for me to hear a child had Measles, it meant they had to stay in bed, with the room darkened until the illness finally passed.  It was simple to me and I assumed each child made a rapid recovery-but my eyes and heart were suddenly opened one day when a phone call came late one night and  watched my Mom speaking, somehow knowing the news was very bad.

She quickly packed the "familiar suitcase" with clothes for me, telling me I would be spending the night at our neighbors house.  I recall tugging on the hem of her dress, begging to know what was wrong and finally she looked down with tears flowing and said "Your Cousin is very sick and we need to get to the hospital fast!"  My heart was pounding as we jumped into our old vehicle and headed to the neighbors house.  Everything moved so Fast-but there was a moment when we reached the neighbors and Mom began giving more details as to what was so terribly wrong with my dear Cousin.  She must have thought I was out of earshot but "God" had me standing close enough to hear "Her Cousin has the Measles and they settled on her brain.  She is in a Coma and has only a few hours left to live!"  

That was it-Mom patted me on the head, told me to be a good girl and she was gone!  My heart was broken and I didn't know how my life could go on without my dear cousin beside me.  Something told me the neighbor could see this load of fear inside a little girl and I recall how gently she tucked me into bed, and at this second-my heart opened up and I asked her "Do you think if I pray really Hard for my Cousin that God will let her Live?"  To this day I can recall her standing over me, trying so hard to keep her composure and not let a child see more tears from an adult-she paused for the longest time and finally said "Well of course you should pray-God will Hear your words and it will help!"

She flipped the light off and I began to pray, but God seemed so Far away from me and I felt my praying had to be really "Strong" so He would hear my words of prayer.  But as I started to pray, there was no strength in my words, instead God heard a tiny girl, crying from deep within her soul as she prayed "Dear God-this is Martha-I am sorry that I don't know how to Love you yet but Please I really Need you to run to the hospital and Heal my Cousin-do not take her away from me!"

Instantly all my Fear was gone and in its place was an amazing warmth in my heart- "Love for God" had reached my young heart and I went to sleep with the most peaceful feeling inside-knowing my Cousin was going to be okay.  The night flew by and Mom was there early to pick me up-again God gave me all I ever needed to Love Him-as Mom told the Neighbor"We had a Miracle last night! The Doctors came out and told us there was only an hour left so we needed to all be with her!" He asked us to wait for a few moments before we went in and we all stood there, holding each other up-but the Doctors appeared again and had a look of shock on their faces as they said "We do not have any clue as to what just happened, but this child is alive, out of her coma and is speaking, asking for all of you-so all we can say is God must have been  listening to your prayers!"

From that day forward to now, my heart has always remained united in love with God!  I spoke to him with a child's heart and He filled that heart with Love that will never leave and taught me about Miracles.  My Cousin did have a hard recovery, but she is alive and well today with no memory of what happened to her so many years ago.  I will always remember that day-because its the day I fell truly in Love with God and He saved my precious cousin.