It never stops hurting---PAIN--my friendly side-kick is always present, sometimes settling into a steady Hum~~~not pulling so much of me down. These are the good moments with Pain being in my life~~~strange as that sounds. Its a grudging respect of sorts that I have slowly learned to give Pain~~~believe me, I do Not like giving anymore of me to this long battle with Chronic Pain!
I look in the mirror and see just how much Pain has really robbed from me~~~my face is a roadmap of Wrinkles~~~some is the natural process we call Aging, but the rest feels like true battle scars I carry as a result of so many years of Pain being constantly with me. There are days when I am not up for the battle~~~I retreat into my corner of the Pain Ring and simply take care of Me! I know Pain will not stop, but this is where the "Peace Treaty" seems to take place~~~~Pain probably kicks angry dust up, not wanting the battle to stop for even a second~~but seems to understand- 'She is coming back--I will just Wait for her."
If I could give anybody some advice on how to live with Chronic Pain~~~it sounds lame but its the way I see this wicked thing called Chronic Pain--No one person can tell you how to fight your personal battle---You are the only one who knows the Path. Take advice with a grain of salt- many people care deeply and hate seeing anybody in Pain.
Its a lonely journey we walk with Chronic Pain~~~~please pray for us, we need heart-felt words of Prayer. God bless.
martha
Martha, your writing has improved so much since I first came to read your post. Truly God is giving you ways of expressing yourself that draws one into your words. I pray others will be drawn to your honest blog...those who struggle with the chronic pain ,who also need to express themselves. Blessings my sister.
ReplyDeletemy dear Betty--
ReplyDeleteoh how you can make my heart feel love and warmth during all this rotten Pain... What a wonderful compliment you have sent my way~~~THANK YOU.... The journey is VERY rough--
this NECK pain can throw me into my chair--with me feeling like a small child, holding my hand up as I try to protect myself from the massive waves of Pain.... This will only get worse.... Silently I think--GOD how am I going to get through this??? Then I can "feel" a gentle whisper~~~~~
"I AM HERE MARTHA"
and the Neck seems to ease for a few seconds... Now--lets throw my BACK into the mix~~
oh heck---I will wait on that for another day!!! My oh My--I just felt like Scarlett O'Hara~~~~
I Wlll THINK ABOUT THAT TOMORROW!!.....
all my love to you and Ace!!! I am so blessed to have you in my life.... martha
I stumbled upon your post and have added it to my side bar. I've been following for a little while, but have not commented. I appreciate your honesty. That has been the toughest for me in fighting my chronic pain (due to fibromyalgia and osteo-arthritis). I walk a thin line of knowing what to say and when to say nothing, but simple persevere.
ReplyDeleteBeth~~
ReplyDeleteThank you for dropping in--I am very touched--there are many blogs I view and don't leave any words... I am such a "computer don't know anything person" that I worry there might be a wrong button I push or something--so please know I am very happy to see your name...
Betty-I am sorry you must fight with Fibro and Osteo~~~I have a good friend whose wife suffers with Fibro and her life is so limited, due to the intense Pain... That "Thin Line" you speak of--oh its so dang TRUE---but I LOVE your last word~~~~~PERSEVERE!!!! Hold on Beth--Please know you have another person pulling for you---her name is Martha.... You are in my prayers