"If you only knew"
I am struggling today-my heart is jumbled up with sadness and anger! Yes-I am angry at this invisible foe of mine called Chronic Pain-but there is new Anger as I deal with the news of a dear friend-seriously ill from a major surgery, hoping to get better and leave the hospital. But life has a way of turning on a dime-major complications arose and she is headed back to the hospital, facing additional Surgery, with major concerns as to all her body has been through.
If you only knew how Helpless I feel-all I can do is call her husband to share words with him on the phone, my heart breaks as I hear fear in his voice-he is also wrapped up with feeling Helpless. Today I pulled my aching body out of bed, rushing to our church so I could ask our Priest to Pray for this dear lady and her loving husband. I lean on the power of Prayer-knowing it does work-God hears every word we speak in prayer and right now, all I can do is Let Go and Let God take over!
I needed something to distract me from the Fire burning up and down my leg- my husband knew the perfect spot-a nearby Craft Store! New ideas of Embroidery work seemed to be whirling around me as I flew through the store, grabbing Thread, patterns, and fabric. A sales clerk saw me leaning against a table, as I worked to stretch my burning leg, and asked if I needed help-
Yeh, find me a new leg, turn sixteen years of time back and pull me away from a stupid tree!
I assured her all was well and headed to the check-out isles, wanting only to find my husband and head for home. But one final stop was needed, the dreaded Grocery Store-as I noticed my husband keeping a safe distance near me, his silent way of letting me know "I got your back-we will be out of here Fast!"
This might have been one of our Record Runs through the Food Isles, but I didn't care and suddenly we were walking out the doors-when Pain Showed Up- a man was walking toward us, but there was no way you could call it Walking! My eyes were fixed on him, one leg moved forward, then took an awkward swing, causing his body to wobble as he struggled for the next step. I couldn't comprehend how hard the struggle must be for this man-his look probably holds the same words
If You only Knew how Helpless I feel
we drove home in silence-I turned to God and prayed
Please God, Please help my friend, her loving husband, the stranger who passed my way and Please help me and please watch over all who must fight the battle of Chronic Pain.
God Bless you.
martha
Martha, Martha, I truly have no words. If my words could alleviate your pain, I would write, speak, scream non-stop....
ReplyDeleteIf only YOU knew how hopeless I feel.
In the midst of your pain, your heart reaches out to others. Those you know. Those you will never know but happen to walk past you on the street.
I am weeping tears as I pray for you, dear friend....
Diane-
DeleteGod gave you the perfect WORDS for me today! I also got a glimmer of what it must be like to stand on "the other side" and watch in silence as Suffering comes your way.
Thank you for such caring words-giving me words of praise, that lift me up and help me.
Your tears-oh my goodness, what can i say?
Bless you Diane. God is SMILING each time you write, share, pray, cry, laugh-heck, even when you might fuss for a second or two!!
More than anything-thank you so much for simply caring.
(((love)))martha
Yes, our Lord, it is you alone we can turn to, in every care we have. For didn't you promise rest for us when we do?
ReplyDeletePlease help this lady go through one more surgery, God, make her body strong for this one and onto healing, Lord. Grab hold of that dear husband whose world is shattering before his eyes with hope in the tight embrace you give him, Father. Comfort, strength and knowledge that you are there, stretching your long arm of healing grace.
And for Martha, for Ace and for all those in the road of PAIN, our GOD. You are far greater than all these thing which looks monstrous and towering over us.
Peace, calm, faith... we beg from you and for sustenance of the things we need.
*********
Oh, Martha, I am happy that you got time out to the hobby shop. Please when you get time, you might like to give some pictures of your embroider collection, which I believe are now aplenty.
Lolita-
DeleteHow do you always find such words that go straight to the heart?
I am lifted high today by the blessing they bring to me! My heart is also so grateful for your prayers about my good friend--a quick update~~my friend is not able to face surgery right now. She is terribly weak and the doctors are hoping to heal the problem with medications! So prayers are still very needed and I thank you for them.
You gave me a good idea-Getting my husband to take some photos of my Embroidery work--nothing fancy but as my dear Granny would say
"Grand-daughter, keep those hands moving-everything else will work out!"
Bless you dear Lolita!
(((hugs))) martha