Saturday, October 20, 2012

Could I ever change this Pain?

Well this is a big diving off point to start at~~ Pain is a force like non other and it does Not like changes that might diminish the daily havoc wreaked on a person's body, mind, and soul.  I have seen suffering up close~~ its not a pretty thing to see.  Nothing about Pain is glamorous or exciting~ the tiny victories I gain do not give me time to shout  Good News out among friends- by the time I would start buzzing computer lines with my news, Pain comes roaring  back to my ravaged leg~~pulling, burning, tingling, numb to the bone-all physical issues I must face daily.  

After so many long years with Pain beside me~ I am slowly learning the importance of that word Change,
and I am hit with an awareness  I might have the "Change Pain Thought" going in the wrong direction.  Nothing will change the Sciatic Nerve in my leg that was crushed from the Tree fall, long years of a Nerve
wrapped with Scar Tissue that is firmly planted~~seeming to dare any surgeon who struggled to remove a mass of Scar Tissue looking like a crazy mess of Super Glue!

 Change must come from me~~~ Not an easy challenge-we stumble each day as we try to find our way in this journey with Chronic Pain.  Some might say my options are limited~ I do not agree~~ In my darkest hours of walking the floor with Pain, calling for His helping hand, there is a moment of Change!  I chose to look past the wicked Pain and lean on Faith.

It would be wonderful to say  Pain changes in a second~~ but a gradual change comes~~
 it is gentle, silent~~and I find peace to reach for sleep.  Nothing is perfect~~ but if I  work
with the Pain~~ not Against it~~ I know beyond any doubt I can cope, come rain or shine.  There are moments when I glance up and see my motto-as a sudden urge hits me to give these words a thrashing,
but I stop because God's love is written in these simple words~~

                                            ~~~~~~~Pain Won't Beat Me~~~~~~~

I keep going, taking it one day at a time and think of others who are suffering~ my prayers are with you.
Martha

2 comments:

  1. Wow--such powerful thought! And, YES! I too have been lead by the Lord to recognize that, although my pain continues to roar, I CAN BE ChANGED for the better--better able to appreciate the beauty around me; better able to see and help those who suffer, and better able to connect with Him.

    One of my questions to people I counsel is: "Are you a chronically-in-pain person" OR a person who has chronic pain? " The way we look at it makes all the difference!

    Thank you for your vision, and your beautiful expressions of thought!

    Judi

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    Replies
    1. Judi~~
      Your words just added so much DEPTH~~~ especially these Four amazing words that speak Volumes~~~ I CAN BE CHANGED...... It has taken
      years of me sometimes feeling the urge to "beat my head against the wall" as I try to continue coping with my Pain.

      Yet in those moments~~ as I calm down, literally praying my way back to peace and understanding~~~ There comes the lesson of CHANGE.

      It will never be easy~~ but its worth the effort.

      Thank you for bringing an even greater understanding of Pain~ we are the ones who face it each day, and I give thanks to knowing HE is beside me!

      Bless you for these loving words Judi. I am honored by your comments.

      Martha

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