Chronic Pain-A Constant Process of Learning~~~

This statement seems to Fit Chronic Pain perfectly~~

"It is what it is!"

 Chronic Pain has its way with us- it Keeps going and going-dragging us through the Worst days, but occasionally letting a few needed seconds of Relief sneak through.  One friend told me how she views  my Pain level-"It shows in your Eyes, and it wipes away the delightful sparkle we have seen in your eyes!" Yes, no way to deny that one-Pain pounds away on my body, leaving me with frayed nerves, complete physical exhaustion-there is not enough Makeup in the world to hide all the Battle scars Chronic Pain leaves on us.

We who walk this Path are constantly battling all the issues that join Chronic Pain-lack of sleep-Pain loves to roar during the night hours, Pain medication doesn't help as much and we try to adjust, but nothing makes it any easier.  I find myself  praying more these days-begging God for extra tools to fight Pain.  Maybe the tools don't arrive on my time schedule but suddenly I notice the Pain went from unbearable to manageable.   

We are constantly learning something "new" about coping with Pain- Advice, Research, and Prayer!  Lately my lessons have come from me asking others a simple question- "Do you think I can keep this Battle Going?"  Instantly I throw my fighting words in before they can answer-because I am trying to assure them of my Determination!  Then it hits me- I did ask a question of them and my head drops in frustration:
"Time for Martha to be Silent-letting my Heart open fully to their words." 

Nobody has ever told me "I don't think you have it in you anymore"  as they worry, there could be a Sudden Slinging of Fighting Words coming from me!  Here is one of my most important lessons lately-I notice there is No hesitation in their answer "Martha-you will Never Quit Fighting, anybody who knows you is fully aware of that fact!"  

 Today  I asked a friend this same question and  his answer came in two parts:

First he assured me there was no Doubt in his mind of my Courage to keep fighting the Pain,

but his next statement touched me to the core of my being:

"Martha, I just wish you could have some Peace!"  

My heart ached at these words-because I realized the same Wish was in my heart too!  Another lesson seemed to tug at my heart- perhaps I need to put my Fighting Stance just to the side of me, so I can have my eyes and heart open for Peace that is all around me-simply waiting for me to look its Way!

Each person has developed their way of coping with Chronic Pain, but even the toughest will fall and stumble during this Journey. Trying to go a full Fifteen Rounds with Pain-well its a Fight that even Rocky Balboa might run from!   

Please know, I pray for everyone who suffers with Pain.  Keep me in yours!~~~

God bless.
martha